♥ What A Way To Be In Love. ♥
Saturday, July 31, 2010 ( 11:12:00 PM )
Early in the morning, I met nad.. 9.30am at hougang interchange.. She accompany me to ubi for my FTT and PDL. Yessa! FTT booked. And PDL alrdy applied. Now what's left is to look for instructors. Eventually, instructor found.. and I will start my private practical driving tmr!! OMG. The uncle la.. the moment when I called him.. I told him if he wants to be my driving instructor nxt week. But he told me.. how about tmr?? -.-
Haha. This weekend, seems like very busy for me.You see ah, today early morning only mummy was like.. "Later afternoon u free? Me and aunty wants to go to Geylang" Whereas, today I made plans with baby to go out with him. And settle my driving stuffs. Im craving for satay anyways.. If mummy had alrdy told me yesterday that she wants to go out w me.. I would have gone out with baby tmr.
Haish.. Why do plans have to like go haywire? I dunno if its cos of I really didnt planned my time well. I dunno if I can possibly cancel my plans with baby, just to accomodate to mummy. But, its ok. Whatever happens.. happens. Just learn to live with it. And the very best example now that I could give you is that.. mr a is late when he meets me. I waited for damn freaking 45mins to 1hr just because he got stuck in the ndp traffice jam thingy. Haiz. why life today shows that I had improper planning. The way things are going now.. it makes me think twice if I do really have made a wise choice to go out with ihim today. Honestly, it doesnt seem to be wise. Not even close.
So by the time mr a was late. My stomach was already hungry.. and I waited like a fool for him. Under a block, sitting alone.. I cried as I was staring at passerby's. I'm so hungry and lonely. If I had taken it too seriously, I would have just gone home without meeting mr a. I wanted to meet him a.s.a.p so that we could spend time more. But I think he fails to see that. I thought he would have just gone home after work and picked me up under my block.. so that we could eat dinner. However, it seems as if he kept on delaying the whole time. I could have just met him at 6.30pm or 7.00pm ok.. if he picks me up under my block. Instead, I only see him at 9.00pm and about 11.05 pm he asks if we gonna go home. WTH. All I want is just to spend time with you.. but all you can say is we have already spent time more than 2 hours.
Like what.. 2hours and 5 mins?Dont try to justify things.. when what you're doing is just simply denying everything. Im sorry if I have loved you so much. I'm sorry if i had miss you a lot. I'm sorry if I do crave for you day by day. I think its just best that you stay away from me when I'm having PMS. Thats what you suggested right. You just dun understand.
The way just now I kept on asking if you want to pick me up.. you kept on asking me back if I wanted to pick u up. In the end, I got fed up and I just say I'm ready and leaving the house. Whereas when I left my house.. you were still at home. I thought you would reach on time.. Being late is not considered on time you know. And I complained that you're late.. all you could do is shhhhhhhh, okok eat eat the satay. Is that the best that you've got? Maybe I'm asking for too much. Just why cant a guy be initiative without the girls tell them what to do. Why cant you be the one to decide, instead of asking WHERE, WHEN, HOW WHAT, WHY, WHO everytime. Lastly, I told you a simple instruction to msg me back when ur home.. you said ok. And what happen.. silence? If this is what you want.. ok. Maybe I am already doing too much.. Maybe I am already concern bout you too much. Let me tell you this, I will not start to fcuking care. Happy?
The problem is, you never cheer me up today. You know you're late. So be it.Labels: mr.a
♥ Overcome The Challenge. ♥
Friday, July 30, 2010 ( 10:06:00 PM )
When u think life is a challenge, u will struggle everyday thinking why mishaps do happen. But don’t worry, cos your not alone. You still have Him. So smile even if life is unfair.. that’s not the worst that could ever happen. Cubaan.
I said this to cheer myself up. I hope I did cheer u up too.Labels: life is the way it is
♥ Just The Way You Are. ♥
Thursday, July 29, 2010 ( 11:47:00 PM )
Just as when I thought my world is falling..
When I feel so down with all the family challenges..
You were there for me.
He cheered me up. Without even realizing, you brought a smile to my face. What more can I say, I love you.
|a|m|r|i| says: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5lO4hEAJHU&feature=related. for you b
Love.Sara says: eh..
|a|m|r|i| says: heheh.. thats how i feel
Love.Sara says: awwww.. and you know wen u say that i dun believe it
|a|m|r|i| says: exactly!
Love.Sara says: Yeah I know, I know.. When I compliment her.. She wont believe me. hahahaha
|a|m|r|i| says: thats why i say its for you
Just the way you are ~ Bruno Mars
Oh her eyes, her eyes
Make the stars look like they're not shining
Her hair, her hair
Falls perfectly without her trying
She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day
Yeah I know, I know
When I compliment her
She wont believe me
And its so, its so
Sad to think she don't see what I see
But every time she asks me do I look okay
I say
When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are
Her nails, her nails
I could kiss them all day if she'd let me
laugh, her laugh
She hates but I think its so sexy
She's so beautiful
And I tell her every day
Oh you know, you know, you know
Id never ask you to change
If perfect is what you're searching for
Then just stay the same
So don't even bother asking
If you look okay
You know I say
When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you are
The way you are
The way you are
Girl you're amazing
Just the way you are
When I see your face
There's not a thing that I would change
Cause you're amazing
Just the way you are
And when you smile,
The whole world stops and stares for awhile
Cause girl you're amazing
Just the way you areLabels: songs fill my heart
♥ A Trip To Adam Road. ♥
Saturday, July 24, 2010 ( 9:14:00 PM )
He seems friendly with the bike uncle. Haha. Like as if they have beem friends for long.. And the uncle know how to say.. Bismillah & Alhamdullilah. Confirm his customers are mostly Malays. If not, how does he learn the word rite.. Bismillah we use it to start our bikes.. and alhamdulillah we use it when everything's alright. (: Im just happy that muslims nowadays still remember god.
While moving away from thebike shop.. the uncle said.. "Matair". I think he was refering to me.. And mr a n I just smiled. at this point of time, my mind is already like thinking with so many things! Imagine if mr a brings other girls to the shop.. Then the shopkeeper would say the same thing.. omg
Anyway, let's not think about unhealthy thoughts. Today, marks my first time when he brought me to Adam road. For once, I am super excited! and its him who brought me there. At first he thought, Bukit Timah prata house would be good. Then instantenously he thought randomly for a while and he ask me.. you nk makan kat adam road? I shouted NAAAAAAKKKKK! Hehe. Yes, I did shout
I had special fried mee goreng.& cheezy fries. I thought, having chicken rice would be good. But then again, mr a is having the chicken rice. Might as well I get other stuffs. Takkan plak I nk makan same chick rice ngan mr a eh.Or prolly next time, we cn do this.. share our meals.. eat half of everything. Like I eat half of mine, and half of yours. Like that better.. caring is sharing! Mcm paham ar mr a will eat like that w me. Hurhur
My special mee goreng has some mutton chop on it. The mutton shop is happening. so delicious! The only thing is, the serving of the mee goreng and cheezy fries is super duper a lot. Cant finish it.. Had to waste food. ): I dun like wasting food actually. But this guy here, always remind me.. if u keep on forcing urself to eat, you can end up being fat. Huahua
So am i really scared of being fat? Or i dun finish the off cos I dun want to make it as if i'm forcing myself? Actually.. I also dunno. Thru out our meal, mr a shared with me bout his mum. Smile k bie.. dun stress. :D After eating, he sent me home. I was so tired and sleepy. Supposedly, gonna meet Farhanah in the afternoon to attend sum fair. Haha. But after I reached home.. I dozed off. So did she. So did mr a. *We’re like a bunch of tired people.Labels: a smile on my face
♥ Our first time. ♥
Friday, July 23, 2010 ( 11:59:00 PM )
When everything just feels so right, I want to be with you tonight.
It's a night well spent with you dear. (: I'll remember this date today.. let's mark it as one of the special moments we had ok? (Well, actually, most of the time we had, its equally considered as a special moment.. But let's make tonight a very very special moment.) There is always the "first" to everything we did together. My weekend seem so long cos of you.. gosh.. am I really that in love alrdy? Haha. No matter what, I feel like say sumthing now.. I know I may not say it directly, but I just gotta say it. Deep down inside.. I know you orgnye penyayang. Sangat2 penyayang. Mwaaah. Thank god.
Good moments just end too fast. Wished that it could last forever. But then again, if you get happiness.. you'll get sadness. I will always tell myself, life is never fair.So live with it. There's always eventually be a balance to everything.
After work. I went home. He picked me up under my block.. Waited almost for an hour though. Haha. He brought me to Bugis.. Then to some where near Lavender.. eat and eat and eat. Left our dinner unfinished coz' just had to gotta rush.. badly. (:
*Ook now. Happy moments aside. Let's talk and joke about the funny stuffs.
As we alighted from the bike, this guy and his wife - i supposed- asked a question. "Excuse me, telephone..where?".. And baby just point it towards bugis junction. The guy acknowledged.. cross the road and walked towards the way as baby instructed. My next question was.. "Bie, you point it there.. saying that its there.. but there is where? Later the guy walk aimlessly.. poor thing". And he replied, "He should know. Or maybe he can ask other people".. And I was like thinking.. this guy looks like a foreigner.. cos either him and his companion are not carrying any bag. But baby told me.. so if everyone walks at bugis without a bag, that means they are tourist/foreigners? Isyh, what he said actually do make sense. But that guy the we came across with, spoke with an accent. He doesn't have a telephone, so thats why he needs to make an urgent call. Yaaakdush!
So while we walked to the bugis junction.. the guy almost wanted to cross the road towards bugis junction. And I'm like.. "baby! u never tell the guy where is the telephone.. so he will walk all the way to bugis village. He's at the traffic light now.. later he crossed, then there's no telephone how? He will walk all the way straight". Omg.. poor thing la the guy. You have no idea what must be running thru his mind. Then baby said to me, after u cross the road.. there will be a phone at the coffee shop there. I doubt him, and I asked.. "how you know". He said.. Last time i work at the coffee shop. HahaHahaHaha.Eeeee! geramnyer.
Finally I told him, before that guy crosses the road.. you better tell him that the telephone is at the mrt.. Direct him properly. Not just say "there". Faster!! Direct him before he crossed the traffic light to god knows where! And baby was like, okok.. you go and settle your uob thingy i will tell him. So after I did settle my uob thingy, baby said.. "Baby I told him alrd. Baby I told him alrdy. Baby, ok.. I told him alrdy." And now, I'm so proud of you mr.a :DLabels: a smile on my face
♥ With You, And Only You. ♥
Tuesday, July 20, 2010 ( 11:44:00 PM )
I had a great day with mr a. (: Thank you love for today. Thank you god, for letting me seeing him today. I went to Marina square after work. From there.. I waited for mr a to arrive. Both of us had dinner at the food republic. And he paid for my food. Wow. I paid for the drinks. You know, its the thought that counts really. It't not really how much that counts. Even if the food cost 50 cents, its really the thought that counts.. if you know what I mean.
Me and him walked ard zara and John Little. And I bought zara shoes! $49.90. Call me crazyy and a shopaholic. But I really need a good black shoes with a good sole. Tsk3. I really really need a shoe, even though yesterday I just bought a new one! Hmph. Shhhh. Dun talk about shopping now. I know, I know I have already spent a lot. Anyway, mr a got and accident when on the way home.
He said that its partly his fault that he tried to overtake the car, but ended up the car bang him from the back cos the car is unable to break in time. Now his leg and hips are painful. Oh dear mr a, u better take care of urself k. Dun get me worried much longer. Please, ride safely. Say only you want to be a safety officer. But you have too, take care of your own safety.
Apart from this, what I liked about today is.. whatever we talked, its just random. And whatever we talked, its leads to some topic to talked about. Like the MBS, like our meet up this friday, like I ask if he's not going out with his frens.. And little little questions I ask, we could make a topic out of it. And little little words he said, he's gonna marry me. Dunno when, but he's going to. And the little little songs that we heard at some shops, we could make a song out of it - We are the world, we are the children.. we are the world full of children. This is his lyrics by the way. Hehe.
You made me smile all night long, dear.
Also, he did share with me about a girl named Fathiah who is interested in him. The girl msged him last month lah. Now, shouldn't I be angry that he didnt tell me when it happened. Wow. But then again, I stayed my cool. I mean its not like she will be an obstacle between me and him right. Maybe maybe, its best that his family or frens dunno me yet. Dunno how I look like, and know as little stuffs bout me.
Cos with girls all going gaga over him wen they first saw him, how can my life be more simpler. And same goes for me.. if guys going gaga after me, how can his life be more simpler. All we need to do is stay stronger k bie.. we can do this. Till then again, I see you on Friday. Yes, my life seems to be about mr a. Plus, this week I'm planning to fast fast fast! Fasting mth is near.. must must pay back. Adios & Good night.
Labels: mr.a
♥ Just Me & You Now. ♥
Friday, July 16, 2010 ( 11:33:00 AM )
Today.. we kindda get outta control.
He accompanied me watched eclipse again. Haha. And I accompanied him watcg eclipse too. But then again, why watch eclipse? Hmmm. Maybe I wanted to see Edward Cullen. Maybe there's some regret that watching eclipse is not a good idea. Maybe watching other action heroes movies is better. However, I never regret that I met him today. It's not about the movie, its more of how we spent our precious time together.
Me and him are tired today. Went home early, home sweet home. Ate Long John just now.. and we saw Ame, Jonathan T. with gf. (: Let's meet up soon ame!!Labels: mr.a
♥ Baking Muffins! ♥
Thursday, July 15, 2010 ( 11:44:00 PM )
Its super tiring.. Shagged. I was kindda hoping that it was Friday today.. so that its a late night and wake up late in the next morning. But its not. This time, the "Cupcake's" theme is White & Orange. And its kindda like one of our big shots so far.. cos its for an engagement/wedding. I must say thanks to fafa's elder sister (Sapiah) for publicizing it for us. And yay,.. we can continue our journey to bake more cupcakes of course! Thanks for the support.
Interested people can actually visit our webbie - delightful-addiction.blogspot.com.
Labels: we are baking muffins
♥ Sweet & Random. ♥
Sunday, July 11, 2010 ( 11:30:00 PM )
I met mr a today. Dunno where to go to. And we ended up meeting at Toa payoh, apart from the brilliant idea of Bukit Gombak. I mean Bukit Gombak is a nice place to chill but quite far for me. Heheh.
As promised that we gonna meet up today, we ate at Fork & Spoon. It's quite a bit of romantic strawberry fruit sharing we had just now. The strawberry looks like a heart shaped.. its 2pcs-half-cut strawberry sold for $1.. yeah, tell me about it. Romantic, yet expesive fruit. Hehe.Mr a then accompanied me to get some wardrobe stuffs like clothes hangers.. and we had koi milk tea. I was actually craving for those kind of swensens ice cream. And that's why I particularly agreed when he chose to hang out at Toa Payoh. But then again, he said its a waste of money and recommended me to get the $1 ice cream instead. Tsk3. Nvm. Koi milk tea would be just fine.
In any ways.. mr a is like grrrrr! Imagine this.. Me and him was holding hands.. when he took my hand and place it at his buttock. The next moment, I felt that there were some air and sound when he compressed my hand at his butt. Exactly, you have just imagined the way he farted! Isssyh. I guess he's already to comfortable with me eh? That explains all this stuffs.. Haha. If you that again next time, I place your hand at your butt ok? Fair n square. Chey.. Next we plan to chill after we had late lunch and milk tea. Mr a then stopped at mr bean to buy some pancakes. I was shock. I'm so full when he still can yet munch other stuffs? Haha. He is really getting more and more buncit you know. :D Dear mr a, Just wait till I see you again!Labels: a smile on my face
♥ Weekends, I see you again. ♥
Saturday, July 10, 2010 ( 10:41:00 PM )
Saturday is a busy shopping with Farhanah.
I made a date with her.. and together we watch eclipse! Actually, I have promised mr a that we watch eclipse together.. but then again, promises are meant to be broken right? I'm so mad with the fact that whenever I am angry with him.. I will do the things that me and him are suppose to do together. For example, watching movies.. or going out on the weekend together. Thats y now.. i thought my weekends are gonna be busy or I better start planning to make myself busy. But actually.. I've ended up being not so busy. Haish.
I will still end up meeting mr a tomorrow though. Haha. What am I so unhappy about that?I mean its suppose to be a good sign right that we are meeting each other once again after all? Actually, I've seen him on Monday and Wednesday for this week. Plus.. including tommorow, I am gonna meet him for the third time this week. And this weird feeling of mine,.. I'm not sure if i should be happy or sad. Oh well. For all I know, its a good thing that he starts to misses me alrdy and want meet me so much. Haha.. Mr a dont usually ask people out. Even if he did.. he will be like saying "I am free today but you are not free".. And in the end, i will make up something like.. "I'm free tonight, but not today." And he will believe tonight and start asking me out this nite. HAHA.
However.. in actual fact, he has been punked!I'm still not done shopping with farhanah when we are at Orchard still. omgg. we shop a lot! I bought pants pants pants. One from mango, another from uniqlo. Farhanah bout pants and shirts and rings! oooooh. We felt like a real shopaholic! Haha.. Thank god, we still can control our spendings throughout. And one more thing.. today me n farhanah walked all around town and AMK together with the same shoes! Hahaha. We didnt realize we have the same shoes, only after 2 hrs of meeting up! Hahahahaha.
Let me just mark my diary today.. mr a seems concern about me texting him to tell him that I've reach home.Labels: cheapskating my way through, mr.a
♥ Guy Problems. ♥
Friday, July 9, 2010 ( 11:13:00 PM )
"Hmm. I just receive ur msg. Anw I've forgotten abt the past but when u did all this it rakes up the past nightmares and it scares me that it may happen the same thing again. But its ok.. I learn to pick myself up and be strong.. :)"
mr a..
We're fine now.. only at the end of the day when those are the words you said.
After work went to Vivo with Glory (MOF colleague) and then meet Lynn. Ate old changkee & home sweet home. For the fact that we girls are going out today alone.. we are doing it for the same reason. Guy problem.
Today he seemed busy enuff with work. I msged him, but he said he didnt get it. Well at least, hearing "Good night my dear. I miss you" is good enuff for me already. It makes me feel as if I'm still his dear. And hopefully this thingy hasnt change things much.. except for, it helps to make us stronger together. i miss you too dear. Good night!Labels: words that you said
♥ Love The Way You Lie. ♥
Thursday, July 8, 2010 ( 10:03:00 PM )
Things have been sickening lately. There is no point arguing over and over again when you can't reach to a conclusion. I'm already at my boiling point.. and you can easily just screw this shit! It's easy for you to say things out of anger when you dun even think that what u said can hurt me this much. wow. You're capable of such things. I'm not impressed. My mind has not been thinking straight.. and I think im growing crazy. As much as I dun want to cry for mr a anymore, I am getting emotionally weaker.
S: Love the way you lie.. who you refering to
Mr a keeps quiet
S: bie. ans me. issit about me
A: y? u terase issit?
S: ya. if ur still not happy bout it can say la to me. but if ur nick is like that cos ur trying to let B know that we are not ok.. den ok lor im not angry bout it
A: Hmm y terase if u nvr lie right?
S: u sure i was lying.. when its u who consider it as lying jus because im not open n honest with you? cos till now im not sure wat is ur feelings towards me. i knoe u may seem ok wen we meet or wen we talk.but deep down inside i know i hv hurt u enuff. there is still a scar on a healed wound. i'm trying to clear this mess u know.. nobody say its gonna be easy.
And honestly.. i was doing what i was doing last time cos i thought i was single.there's no restriction on who i was dating n who i need to be frens with. i nv thought we had been all along like a couple. cos u keep on saying to hykel n firman that we are just frens. and i was uncertain of ur feelings towards me.. untill ur bday this yr. thats how long i waited to get an answer whether u do take me seriously or not.
And dun tell me i was lying to you.. cos this shukri thing was in the past. and when B brought this up,its just like a perfect timing that i have deceived you.which in the very first place, i really hv no intention of doing so. and u cn think whatever u like about me. All i know is.. i hv stayed true enuff to you from the very moment we have dated. the only person i called baby and dear is you. the only person i hold hands w is you. and the only person i kissed is you. and the only one in my heart is you.it's up to u to believe me or not.u have eyes.. u cn do ur own judging without anybody influencing you.
And I have been tolerating since monday to cheer u up. But i guess it's not working just fine rite.if u think im not being fair to you just by dating shukri..hv u think if u hv been fair?im not talking bout dating other gerls n being loyal.im talking bout other stuffs. if i had my weak point so do you.and i thought we are suppose to accept each other wen we are being ourselves the best.and im being myself now.whatever u are not good at.. i tried to learn, i tried to accept.i tried to forgive n forget.prolly u hv expected me to be open n honest..which i am not that good at.but i am still trying my best to tell u the truth and be as transparent as i can to you.and let me tell u this.. i am not good at explaining things.. and i am not good at telling the truth that can hurt other pple feelings.beacuse this is y i am taking my time to tell u bout shukri after all the mths we dated, and just as soon as u know bout shukriwhat hv u thought?that i hv another boyfriend.padahal padahal ah eh..because the reason y im not dating anymore is cos of you.you started to change things and i fall for you.and if u still can think im lying to u..up to you to believe it or not.cos i know im talking straight frm my heart.and im hurt that the man tha i love..trust his mind and feelings and his past more that he could trust me.dun let ur past make it easier for u to judge me that i am the same way wen it comes to deception.if ur really blinded by ur past,learn to let it go.
Now i want to ask u the question that i hv been dying to ask u.just what am i to you?hv u ever taken me seriously frm day one u know me? think about what i hv said. and for these answers.. kindly sms pls.dun yak2..later i nv get.i'll wait patiently. and bie.. i've explain myself again now.and u got me angry wen u beat ard th ebush esp wen u said y terase if nv lie?daripade msn sey i tanye2 u..and at last u end up being sarcastic.awesome!it's getting late..good nite dear.
Conversation ended. Time check, till now.. he's keeping quiet. I'm still waiting for his answer though. But i dunno how long more i can stand this. Its a pain to see the situation that we are facing. I'm not sure who to go to for help. Prolly I just have to settle this on my own. I'm like a trash.. left alone in the deep blue to sea to float.Labels: mad about you
♥ Update & Updates! ♥
Wednesday, July 7, 2010 ( 11:20:00 PM )
Wow. So much things to update!
I'm done with bangkok trip. 4 days and 3 nights gone.. wooooo! Happening la.. And when I face the reality back in Singapore, my holiday mood stops. I dun come back only to fight with mr a you know. Only to know that other people are jealous of me and him.. B tried to destroy us both. Life is not fair! It is nv fair.. (well for now uhs). Haish. Its giving me a pretty hard time.
Do I have to start cleaning other people's mess now. Or issit my own mess that I have created? The worst thing that can happen now is.. mr a alrd knows bout shukri. thank you B for telling mr a that i hv an affair with shukri. this is like so not true.. i mean you guys read my blogs and you know that me n him are just normal friends. We have nothing on.. And I love mr a as much as I could. if i could show you the middle finger to the fcuked person, i would right now. But i know, im not as crazy as you. Please la eh.. insaf lah sikit! Haish...
Im so angry!! Just now I went to meet mr a. I requested that he could meet me randomly. And yes, he did. We skipped dinner. Had starbucks green tea. Sat along clark quay.. and just talk n talk n talk. No, i never mention bout what we quarrelled anymore. I'm just scared. Its like I wanted to ask him like an investigation officer, but im just not that brave enuff and ready yet. Time will come to find its way thru.. hmmmm. Haiya.. im just as clueless and affected by this whole incident. I want be happy with mr a cn?
Please god... let me be happy for just once. Or maybe.. let me find my way to happiness that can last for eternity. Am I like asking too much? even if mr a seems that he is ok right now.. I know he isnt. No more baby or dear in his msgs.. And no more good morning b.. or even good night dear. It pains my heart to see him hurt.
What more can I do? Give me a clue.Labels: i'll live for a better tommorow
♥ Another day, to struggle. ♥
Tuesday, July 6, 2010 ( 11:29:00 PM )
Thank you farhanah for listening through out bout amri. I feel much better after telling you! Haish. But still den again, the thoughts of him just lingers in my head. I mean its not like as if its a good kind of feeling. It's a feeling whereby you were hoping that things can be settled and get back together as usual.
Just as when we had a few happy moments.. sad moments had to come to ruin it all. Isnt it just great? Or purely, its just some bad luck. I remembered my latest post about him was that we went to M'sia together.. and I was mad at him that he didn't even bother to make it up on Saturday. Well eventually he did. Thank you baby.. I enjoyed the trip very much. We ate lots and lots of delicious food. And imagine i spent roughly about $10 for my meals and a little bit of shopping. Hehe. And now, when everything just falls in place.. I cried shedding my tears to see every bits and pieces falling apart.
There's so many words I want to say to you mr a.. So many stories to tell. Sumtimes, I dun even know where to start. I dun even know what to say first. I just hope we really could be stronger and stronger as days past by. Now, I dun care what B has done to ruin us all. The most important thing is, we stand each other side by side to go through thick and thin together now. If i do believe in us.. I hope you do too.
The memory of yesterday, is just painful.
We were as one, for a moment in time..
And it seemed everlasting, that you would always be mine
Now you want to be free, so I'll let you fly
Cause I know in my heart, our love will never die
You'll always be a part of me..
I'm part of you indefinitely.
Boy don't you know you can't escape me..
ooh darling 'cause you'll always be my baby.
And we'll linger on.. time can't erase a feeling this strong.
No way you're ever gonna shake me..
Oh darling, 'cause you'll always be my baby
I aint gonna cry.. and I won't beg you to stay.
If you're determined to leave boy..
I will not stand in your way.
But inevitably you'll be back again..
'Cause you know in your heart babe, our love will never end
You'll always be a part of me..
I'm part of you indefinitely.
Boy don't you know you can't escape me..
ooh darling 'cause you'll always be my baby.
And we'll linger on..
Time can't erase a feeling this strong.
No way you're ever gonna shake me..
Oh darling, 'cause you'll always be my baby
I know that you'll be back baby..
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder.
I know that you'll be back baby..
Oh baby believe me it's only a matter of time
'Cos you're always be my baby mr.a
Labels: mr.a
♥ Fights & My First Love Letter. ♥
Monday, July 5, 2010 ( 11:27:00 AM )
I wrote him a love letter. This is my first time ever.. Meeting mr a at popeye. Yes, I was late this time. Reached tanjong pagar mrt at 6.30pm.. and walked all the way from city hall mrt to the ferris wheel there. Wow, very far. And yeah, he waited for 30 mins for me.. cos I said I will be there at 6.30pm. I dunno how the day is gonna be like tonight.. but I will tawakal. InsyAllah everything will be okay. Amin.
At popeye.. me and him get our own meals. But I had no appetite to eat. I barely ate. Only swallowed one pc of chicken tender and not even finish half of my fries. The rest is left untouch. I dun really got the mood to eat cos me and mr a are like in this state. We hardly talk.. and even when I dun talk to him, he wont strike the conversation with me.Reason being is that, I am not talking to him & that is why he is not talking to me. Eventually, this is where silence filled the air at popeye's.
After eating, me and him went to sit nearby to ferris wheel and talk.. I didnt know what to say at first. So again, we were silent when he was awaiting for me to start the ball rolling. Slowly when I start the talk.. he began to question me why did I go out with Shukri.. and what else he needed to know bout shukri.
Questions:
1) where you go with shukri
2) where you ate
3) what you do
4) after eating where you guys go and do what?
5) when was the last time you saw him
6) Who else was there
But I answered honestly. Even though bits and pieces i dun remember, i was forced to remember. Seriously, I dun wan cos of Shukri, we are fighting till this bad.. cos Shukri is just a fren. And liking him was in the past.
There's a few things mr a don't like on how I answered his question. When I told him that I have forgotten where me and shukri went out for dinner.. he questioned me again, with a remark saying that its imposibble I have forgotten where I ate with shukri. But seriously, i did forget. Haish. And the most important question.. he asks me this.. "why you go out with shukri when you know I was dating you back then"
My answer is simple, I said cos me and him are friends back then. Only then.. mr a got angrier. Our emotions are really on the extreme. He's angry while I'm just sad. *tears* But he still considered that I am not being loyal to him cos I did go out with shukri one-on-one. And when I popped the question about us.. "what am I to you". Mr a said that its suppose to be a mutual understanding eversince we hold hands. It had started eversince. But how can I know that we are really attached when you dont make it official? He said that things doesnt have to be official nowadays. Wow. I guess I have lost the battle and I admit my mistake. Yes.. its my fault that I have hide about shukri all this while. But it doesnt mean that I am going to hide to you forever. Its really a matter of time.
And I know I cant explain properly or logically why I dated shukri back then.. and start giving lame excuses like what you said that I didnt tell you cos I'm scared you'll be jealous. But really, I was afraid to tell you somehow thinking and worried on what you could've reacted. If you want to curse and swear and be angry at me.. you can do it all you want. But dun think that this all my fault whereas you have never make it clear on what we are. You mention a lot of times that we are just friends.. but when I told you that we are friends now.. You cant accept the fact that I thought we are just frens after what we have gone through.
Yes, we may be like couples sumtimes.. but why everytime when I ask you whether we are really friends.. you beat around the bush and didn't give me a straight "yes" or "no" answer. Instead.. you make me think and try to find the answer on my own. Is it good enuff to just understand things with assumtptions and mutual understanding without even telling each other that we like each other heart to heart? I duno what else to think about now. This thing has been going on and on and on my mind and I dun feel that its settled just yet. It's just as fresh as if it had just started. Ohh god.
Well, what mostly I wanted to say to mr a I did. And I typed out the love letter and gave it to him after we fight. I go to youtube and search the song "Always be my baby". I wanted to tell him that he will always be one no matter what happens. But then again, its seems that now after all this incident.. it wont be as easy as for him to call me his baby anymore. It seems like he's just more comfortable with "I" and "You" or "awak" and "saya". This pains my heart. *tears*
"I dah bilang you, kalau benda i tk suka jangan buat.if you do the things that I dun like, dun be surprise i will be doing the same too..."Labels: words that you said
